Soap Things That Make You Go 'Hmm'

[Steven]

On EastEnders the other day, I noticed that Deano says "a mong" instead of "among". It seemed oddly appropriate.

[[james]]

I pretty much ignore everything that comes out of Deano's mouth and focus on him looking purdy.

I'm always fascinated by nights-out in soaps. Hollyoaks, for example, it's always really light out when people are at the Loft at the night out and no student ever seems to go to the SU Bar in the evenings. Also, scenes on a night out are almost always intercut with someone having their tea or coming home from school.

[LoveMusic]

They never watch TV, and people can miss school really easily

[Greg]

I know, obviously, soaps are slightly confined space-wise, by their very nature, but it does irritate me, particularly on Eastenders that no-one ever seems to leave the square. Coronation Street is marginally better, Hollyoaks is betterer. But none are great.

I mean, on Eastenders, when going for a night out, they go to the market. Who buys going-out clothes from a market on their own street? Surely Stacey would go to Zara or Pilot or something? And then when they do go out, they go just down the street. I mean, OK, they don't have to worry about taxis, but it'd be nice to go somewhere a bit different other than the Vic or Scarlett's once in a while wouldn't it?

[Nick]

Why did Sally Webster 'have' to go to work at the knicker factory when she stopped being Ian's PA? Obviously she was going to have to take some kind of a step-down in her career, but why the fuck not get the tram into Manchester and go to a few temp agencies like everyone else? Half the temporary jobs in the city are based within half a mile of Salford Weatherfield Quays, and she'd get to work in an office, at a desk, which is all she ever really wanted to do, and even after they'd taken their slice of the wages she couldn't be earning less than she is now. And loads of temp jobs always end up becoming permanent, anyway. It's more experience, if nothing else. Stupid, brilliant Sally.

Having said that, the new factory set in Coronation Street is really, really fantastic. It's nicer than most of the houses.

[jetsetwilly]

How come every time someone wants to "celebrate" at home e.g. Martin is released from prison, Tyrone has a laydee round, or Gail manages to spot the bleeding obvious for once, they always go to the local pub to buy their alcohol? Do they not realise how appalling the mark up is on pub wine, and they're buying a whole bottle of it? Someone should open a Bargain Booze in Walford; they'd make a bomb.

[Nurse Dunkley]

Neighbours is the worst for that.

There was a good month or two when the only time we'd see Karl was when he was in Scarlett Bar buying wine. They'd obviously demolished his flat set.

This leads into all the "Hmmmms" one could have about the sets on Neighbours, particularly the one classroom school with the ever changing posters and the multi purpose hospital ward, but it's just too easy.

[jetsetwilly]

nursedunkley said:

This leads into all the "Hmmmms" one could have about the sets on Neighbours, particularly the one classroom school with the ever changing posters and the multi purpose hospital ward, but it's just too easy.

Like when Paul Robinson's office became Dr Karl's surgery by the genius procedure of sticking a white sheet over his desk and pretending it was a bed?

It actually reminds me of another annoyance which I spotted in last night's Stenders; they were showing upstairs in Jonny Allen's house, and he had redecorated the whole place in his astonishingly testosterone fuelled style. How come no-one in soaps has a shitty back bedroom that's still decorated for a fairy princess four year old and they haven't got round to doing up? Everyone moves in and immediately calls in a horde of decorators to weld the home to their "vision", like they're Liz Taylor.

[xenomaniac]

junky said:

yea - how did a second storey suddenly appear in the factory? i know they renovated but finding room to stick in a whole new level is amazing - one of those soapy 'we rearranged the shop/cafe and found it to be at least three times as big as it was before' jobs - hmmm indeed.

Dev's shop still confuses me. Surely they're coming in through the back?

[Nicholas]

nick said:

but why the fuck not get the tram into Manchester and go to a few temp agencies like everyone else?

Well: we only ever really see the trams during credits of one sort or another. They hardly seem to register within the Street itself. What makes me go "hmm", however, is that when we do see trams, they only travel from the right of the screen to the left. Now I don't know which direction Manchester is from the street, but the single direction tram might explain why Sally felt unable to look for work further afield. Too awful to get trapped in Manchester with its lovely shops et c and possibly miss the girls fish finger tea as a result. Also, she's such a whore that even if there is a tram back home again, I bet she'd stop out all night with yet another unsuitable man. I know I would.

[Nick]

nickjco said:

nick said:

but why the fuck not get the tram into Manchester and go to a few temp agencies like everyone else?

Well: we only ever really see the trams during credits of one sort or another. They hardly seem to register within the Street itself. What makes me go "hmm", however, is that when we do see trams, they only travel from the right of the screen to the left. Now I don't know which direction Manchester is from the street, but the single direction tram might explain why Sally felt unable to look for work further afield. Too awful to get trapped in Manchester with its lovely shops et c and possibly miss the girls fish finger tea as a result. Also, she's such a whore that even if there is a tram back home again, I bet she'd stop out all night with yet another unsuitable man. I know I would.

But none of the trams in Manchester only go in one direction! Although I have wondered if it just flies past and doesn't actually have a stop there. Is the tram viaduct the thing that collapsed (in the programme, not real life, if there's a distinction) back in the days when it was still in black and white, and they wanted to rebuild half the set?

Also, is Coronation Street on the Eccles branch or the Altrincham branch of the tram route? If it's Eccles, she'd be quicker on the bus. Bit of advice for you there, Sally.

I hope she's reading this.

[Nicholas]

nick said:

Is the tram viaduct the thing that collapsed (in the programme, not real life, if there's a distinction) back in the days when it was still in black and white, and they wanted to rebuild half the set?

Also, is Coronation Street on the Eccles branch or the Altrincham branch of the tram route? If it's Eccles, she'd be quicker on the bus. Bit of advice for you there, Sally.

I hope she's reading this.

I think it is the same collapsing viaduct. And didn't it kill somebody quite important as it fell? As for which branch the street is on, I don't know, but the trams seem to go quite fast - they don't look like they're stopping. Sally strikes me as more of a bus person anyway.

[jetsetwilly]

nickjco said:

Sally strikes me as more of a bus person anyway.

In the sense that she's quick, cheap, easy to get onto and provides an extremely bumpy ride?

[Steven]

Oh, SNAP.

[LoveMusic]

Doesn't Corrie only have one bus?

I live in a tiny village, and even we have a bus every 15 mins

[Nurse Dunkley]

And it's a tiddly little bus too, bless it.

Whilst we're talking Corrie, it would be wrong to have this thread and not mention that the Rovers' loos are in Ken and Deirdre's house.

[Nicholas]

nursedunkley said:

the Rovers' loos are in Ken and Deirdre's house.

Blimey - I think you're right. It could explain an awful lot about Tracey Barlow.

[Robbing the Dead]

I know we have had a bit of a heatwave in London, but how has Pauline Fowler managed to get a tan a Nigerian would be envious of?

[WhiteNoiseMaker]

boydsbummerbuddy said:

I know we have had a bit of a heatwave in London, but how has Pauline Fowler managed to get a tan a Nigerian would be envious of?

That's cos they cut the whole Walford nuclear blast storyline. It'll be on the DVD.

[JonSpice]

I love that. The Duckworths, for example, will go to see some long lost family member for a week in Grimbsby and come back with a Seychelles tan.

[Nurse Dunkley]

Oh, one of the main things that makes me go "hmmm" is when actors are obviously having time off or filming else where, so their characters don't appear when otherwise they would. Neighbours is the worst for this, like when Paul didn't go to Dylan's memorial service (I know they wrote an excuse in the next day, but still), or when the Timminseses do something as a family but there's often one off elsewhere. Sometimes in Eastenders you don't see a character for months without explanation.

[xenomaniac]

nursedunkley said:

Oh, one of the main things that makes me go "hmmm" is when actors are obviously having time off or filming else where, so their characters don't appear when otherwise they would. Neighbours is the worst for this, like when Paul didn't go to Dylan's memorial service (I know they wrote an excuse in the next day, but still), or when the Timminseses do something as a family but there's often one off elsewhere. Sometimes in Eastenders you don't see a character for months without explanation.

Hollyoaks is also really bad for this. It's the reason why random characters are suddenly best friends when they'd previously never spoken to each other before.

[Nurse Dunkley]

Also! It really annoys me in soaps where extras are put into a position where they would definitely speak, but obviously aren't being allowed to. It doesn't hapen too often, and is mainly when character 1 walks up to character 2 who's been having a conversation with an extra, and character 2 will say something to end that conversation and the extra will just nod and walk off.

Yet another thing that makes me go hmm is when characters are living in a house/flat/office that is very obviously a real building, due to the lighting and sound difference with the permanent soap sets. Whenever you see this you instantly know that the character(s) won't be living there for long. i.e. Katya and the Kinski kids' current abode.

[Adrian]

nursedunkley said:

Also! It really annoys me in soaps where extras are put into a position where they would definitely speak, but obviously aren't being allowed to.

Ooh, I love that. It's like a game. I love whooping "ooh, good emoting, non speaking extra" when they emote well, and yet do not speak.

A

[booers]

[/quote] Also, is Coronation Street on the Eccles branch or the Altrincham branch of the tram route? If it's Eccles, she'd be quicker on the bus. Bit of advice for you there, Sally.

I hope she's reading this.[/quote]

I'm reading it! I never thought I'd see a thread on here that mentioned my hometown! Ah, sweet Altrincham, how I miss thee from London.

In rush hour she'd be quicker jumping around in a sack than getting the Metrolink. It's so slow.