Cost-a-fortune-um

[Robbing the Dead]

And so this dire series of adverts continues. I hate the way the estate agent boy nods after he says it as well.

I HATE THE WHOLE FAMILY! I hope they all die in house fire.

[Nurse Dunkley]

Is this the BT one?

*doesn't wait for an answer*

I just do not "get" these ads. Why have they decided to shack Him From My Family with a sugar mama? Which audience are they trying to connect with there? Why does he have such awful facial hair? He looks like a meth addict. Why the general grey tone of the ads?

RTDT, if you want to help the house fire along, I'll provide you with an alibi.

[[james]]

I swear when Him off My Family and the boy shake hands there's a sly glance hinting at a sexual tension between them.

[Robbing the Dead]

nursedunkley said:

RTDT, if you want to help the house fire along, I'll provide you with an alibi.

I was at yours sticking it in you.

[[james]]

boydsbummerbuddy said:

I was at yours sticking it in you.

It's a wonder why people don't use gay sex as an alibi more.

[Steven]

It's quite rare that an advert is so awful it convinces me I should cancel an existing contract that I have with the company in question and find another supplier. This, however, might be one of those times.

[Andrew*]

pandarama said:

It's quite rare that an advert is so awful it convinces me I should cancel an existing contract that I have with the company in question and find another supplier. This, however, might be one of those times.

By coincidence I cancelled my BT service today and the first thing the operator asked was ''What's your reason?'' I was close to giving her that as my reason.

I really do not get these adverts either. This 'oh-so-modern family set up' is just plain creepy.

[queenmurphy]

these adverts are driving me crazy!

and ive got an awful feeling they are going to run and run and run.......

i mean they're buying a new house so obviously they'll get married, have a baby etc etc

[Becky]

This series of adverts reminds me of an episode of wife swap where the "wife" and her children walked all over the guy she was with, and they were all living in his house. Or rather they were using him as somewhere to live.

[Bridgey]

I have a horrible feeling that an acrimonious domestic disturbance is going to take place in a 'late night only' ad, with loads of 'Mummy and boyfriend love you all very much' follow-ups soon after.

Bridgey xxx

[Nick]

I like these adverts.

I like the muted colours.

I like Kris Marshall.

I like that he has snared himself an attractive older woman.

I liked it when the young daughter hugged him unexpectedly.

I liked it when the embarrassed teenage son couldn't quite meet his eye and shook his hand instead.

I like that he makes fun of the stupid estate agent, who is obviously supposed to be stupid.

I don't see what there is to hate, apart from BT.

[Nicholas]

nick said:

I don't see what there is to hate, apart from BT.

Just for starters ...

Nauseating bourgeois smugness?
Ghastly middle-class superiority?
Hideous nuclear family perfection?

[Robbing the Dead]

"Cost-a-fortune-um"

The estate agent boy looks like Mutley when he laughs and nods.

[Nick]

I suppose it is quite bourgeois to decide to live in a house, yes.

This advert suffers at the hands of its stupid audience in the same way that Brokeback Mountain did. They are parallel tales, and share a parallel fate. People watch them expecting lengthy sequences of male physical contact, fucking, thrusting, ploughing, sweating, grappling and bruising. What they actually get are scenes of sparse, awkward dialogue, furrowed brows, repression and tacit affection played out so subtly beneath the surface banality of everyday events that they are lost. Same story in both examples, see.

But the stupid audience is not happy. "What is this advert/film without endless vocalised self-examination?" it cries, in outraged indignation. "Why don't these tortured, tormented/middle-class souls articulate every single thought they have? Where is the poetry? Where are the sharp, rapid-fire exchanges? Where are the impassioned, spontaneous-yet-carefully-researched, allegorical speeches? What use are these inconsequential mumblings to me? I can't quote them in my signature, underneath my avatar OR lift entire lines from them to use as headings for the more poignant posts in my WankJournal!" The audience takes a deep breath, and continues. "It is worthless! There can be nothing more to this lazy film/advert! It is not Proper! It is a waste of my time, and I will never use BT/travel to Wyoming again!" The audience rests; maybe it has a Strepsil after all that shouting.

In consequence, BT lose custom for their internet services but are safe in the knowledge that they own pretty much the entire telephone network infrastructure anyway, and Brokeback misses out on its Oscar because the Acadamy "would have preferred something a little more hardcore".

And it is your fault. Each and every one of you.

[Nicholas]

Interesting.

You don't address the smugness or superiority of the advert, which are the roots of the "bourgeois" and "middle class" criticisms.

The attitudes in this advert are, in common (of course) with most advertising, aspirational. And yet to what, is it, precisely, that we are invited to aspire? A relationship about which we are uncertain? Do we really need a socket for that?

The comparison with Brokeback Mountain may well have some validity. However, anyone who knew anything about Brokeback when they bought the ticket probably didn't expect "lengthy sequences of male physical contact" etc. and to blame an audience for disappointment in this film is probably wide of the mark because it suggests that creatives (ad- people or film makers) can do no wrong.

Brokeback Mountain endeavours to trace the development of a relationship that never makes it. It is a relationship that provides neither of its participants with any fulfillment. The route of the relationship is mis-trust, dis-trust, misery and despair.

And that is the limit, in reality, of the character development. The characters do not seem to develop over the course of the plot. And the plot does not really move very far either.

So far the parallel with the BT ad is sustainable. BT, of course, only has a short period of time to make us care about these people. It doesn't have the beautiful cinematography or soundtrack that Brokeback has (and you might well ask - why not?) . If BT can't make us care about these characters during the span of the advert, surely it has failed to recognise the constraints (and liberties!) of its medium. That failure can't, surely, be blamed on the "stupid audience". To do that, it seems to me, is to do nothing but invite us to look at the emperors new clothes. If the emperor is wearing new clothes in the BT ad, I certainly can't see them.

[LoveMusic]

becky said:

This series of adverts reminds me of an episode of wife swap where the "wife" and her children walked all over the guy she was with, and they were all living in his house. Or rather they were using him as somewhere to live.

Yeah, i felt so sorry for that guy. Whatta sucka

[groopie]

nickjco said:

If BT can't make us care about these characters during the span of the advert, surely it has failed to recognise the constraints (and liberties!) of its medium.

People cared about the Gold Blend couple and probably some other characters in Tesco or Yellow Pages adverts or somesuch back in the day, didn't they?

Although then more people watched the same channel and the same adverts all the time, so you got a kind of watercooler thing going on as well. Hmm... ooh it's just like being back at school, I think of something and then manage to argue myself out of it in the course of a paragraph.

I still can't stand these people though, although I think that may just be a residual My Family hatred.

[Nick]

nickjco said:

You don't address the smugness or superiority of the advert, which are the roots of the "bourgeois" and "middle class" criticisms.

But they're not superior and smug! They're just better than everyone else, and they know it.

[WhiteNoiseMaker]

Well I don't know about any fancy reason why I should love those adverts, all I know is when they come on, I want to fill my mouth with rusty nails and go on a bouncy castle.

[baronrustybox]

i hate the kid. running up the phone bill, just strutting in and calling up his 'mates' mobiles, while the 'stepdad' just nods. id glass the little fucker.

[somethingbiblical]

Why is it such a hard thing for him to say "Call your dad" in the "Mummy, can I phone Daddy in California?" one?

[raspberry]

My reading of the advert -

My Family Man's relationship with his partner Jane's children has been at times awkward and confusing. His relationship with BT is much better as BT are reliable, trust worthy and generous. Both Jane and the son like BT.

My Family Man wants to have al the qualities that BT embodies. It is Jane and BT that are smug and supierior; My Family Man feels worthless but being close to BT makes him feel better.

[jem]

raspberry said:

My Family Man wants to have al the qualities that BT embodies.

What to be a once reputiable company torn up and sold under Thatcher?

[mirodo]

boydsbummerbuddy said:

And so this dire series of adverts continues. I hate the way the estate agent boy nods after he says it as well.

I HATE THE WHOLE FAMILY! I hope they all die in house fire.

I'm in complete agreement with you on this one. I just loved the Guardian's take on it: snipurl.com/tcfe

[Mr Kenneth]

I was at an ad agency discussing a campaign for a competitor provider last week and everyone around the table hated the BT campaign above all the competition (and there are a lot of providers out there!).

It's so hard to like any of the characters when they appear so contrived on so many levels.

• The cosy modern family is a nauseating liberal-minded contrivance to make people 'identify' with them, whatever their own domestic set up
  
• The family itself seems contrived into existence, with the Kris Marshall character not even seeming particularly happy about it. You get the feeling that Jane has masterminded everything and he's being coerced all the time - which incidentally is another hateful thing: the limp, ineffective and generally negative portrayal of men in advertising these days.
  
• And the muted tones of the filming, which contrive to lull the viewer into feeling almost sleepy and comfortable, which is a nasty cynical advertising gimmick far too often used, but in combination with everything else much more evil in this ad.
  

I want the Kris Marshall character to stand up in the middle of an ad where Jane's organising a bundled broadband, phone and tv package with BT and say:

"Jane, I've had enough. I think you and the kids should leave, so I can have my life back. I've been seeing the estate agent. He's called Ian and we're in love and he's got Telewest. Leave your keys on the sideboard, I'm going to the sauna. Oh and when you go, can you take your muted tones with you. This house used to bright and vibrant before you moved in, you sap-sucking machiavellian harridan. Byeee!"