Grace Under Fire

[raspberry]

If she carries on antagonising the readers of Heat like this then they'll have no choice but to continue to give her coverage. That's the last thing Grace will want now, surely?

Oh, and if you are reading this Grace, congrats on the engagement! I cant wait what you'll have to say about that in OK, Hello, Closer, Reveal or Woman's Weekly.

[ruthie]

She seems to be celebrating by appearing on the front page oof The Star in her underwear. Classy AND romantic.

[thelovelykate]

Front cover of Heat this week features her looking sad/cross with the tagline:

"I will be scarred for life"

For complete accuracy this should have featured the addendum:

"But thankfully not on my boobs, which I will persist in getting out at every opportunity".

[georgie]

But thankfully not on my (non existant) boobs, which I will persist in getting out at every opportunity"

[Steven]

thelovelykate said:

"I will be scarred for life"

For complete accuracy this should have featured the addendum:

"But thankfully not on my boobs, which I will persist in getting out at every opportunity".

Thus ensuring that we're all scarred for life, psychologically at least. That Grace, she's so committed to equal opportunities.

[pauliepoos]

Maybe she can do a new reality show, along the lines of Extreme Celebrity Makeover starring with Alan Hanson, Amanda Redman, Gordon Ramsey and Simon Weston, and the woman from the Paddington train crash who had to wear the plastic mask, and we can follow their inspirational struggle and experience all their emotions as they say goodbye to their scars and hello to a new world without physical imperfection.

Clearly Grace would be the star of the series as she's suffered the most and has been left with the most visible scar.

[I Hate Lana Lang]

georgie said:

But thankfully not on my (non existant) boobs, which I will persist in getting out at every opportunity"

Kirkland adopts a Kenneth Williams accent:


"Put them away!"

[audrey notwhatsheusedtobe]

Grrr Grace is talking such shit. My friend's chin was completely burst open in an accident a few years ago. For ages afterwards, the scar was all raised and angry looking, but now it's practically invisible. Therefore, there is no way Grace's little flat forehead scar will be even slightly noticable this time next year. Although I wouldn't be surprised if she's using make up to make it look worse - let's face it, she's pretty skilled in using make up to make herself look terrible already.

pauliepoos said:

Maybe she can do a new reality show, along the lines of Extreme Celebrity Makeover starring with Alan Hanson, Amanda Redman, Gordon Ramsey and Simon Weston, and the woman from the Paddington train crash...

Does anyone know how Gordon got his facial markings? Is it acne gone wrong or something? And what about Alan Hanson, his looks like the result of brain surgery? I must ask my friend (the same one with the chin accident) who has his biography, "Tall, Dark and Hanson".

[thelovelykate]

Is that really the name of Alan Hansen's autobiography? That is the most outstanding pun!

[Nurse Dunkley]

audreyhorne said:

I wouldn't be surprised if she's using make up to make it look worse

I wouldn't be suprised if she's using a knife to make it look worse.

[Joel]

audreyhorne said:

Grrr Grace is talking such shit. My friend's chin was completely burst open in an accident a few years ago. For ages afterwards, the scar was all raised and angry looking, but now it's practically invisible.

Oh, that's a good point! I had a mate who was beaten up so badly his jaw was broken to pieces and he needed a titanium plate put in to hold it together. You can't see a thing now.

If it bothers her that much she can grow a fringe.

[pauliepoos]

audreyhorne said:

Grrr Grace is talking such shit. My friend's chin was completely burst open in an accident a few years ago. For ages afterwards, the scar was all raised and angry looking, but now it's practically invisible. Therefore, there is no way Grace's little flat forehead scar will be even slightly noticable this time next year. Although I wouldn't be surprised if she's using make up to make it look worse - let's face it, she's pretty skilled in using make up to make herself look terrible already.

pauliepoos said:

Maybe she can do a new reality show, along the lines of Extreme Celebrity Makeover starring with Alan Hanson, Amanda Redman, Gordon Ramsey and Simon Weston, and the woman from the Paddington train crash...

Does anyone know how Gordon got his facial markings? Is it acne gone wrong or something? And what about Alan Hanson, his looks like the result of brain surgery? I must ask my friend (the same one with the chin accident) who has his biography, "Tall, Dark and Hanson".

Alan Hanson ran through a glass door when he was 17 and had 22 stitches, according to some random internet search. People seem to be unsure whether Gordon's are a football injury or acne related.

[raspberry]

I haven't bothered to check but I had assumed Grace's "scars" refered to either the fag burns on her arms or mental ones.

[ruthie]

Saw the front of Heat yesterday, there's definately someting of the Bride of Wildenstein about her. A small scar is the least of her problems, i would have thought.

[thelovelykate]

I asked my boyfriend about Gordon Ramsay last night. His response was:

"I thought that was just his face."

[audrey notwhatsheusedtobe]

pauliepoos said:

Alan Hanson ran through a glass door when he was 17 and had 22 stitches, according to some random internet search. People seem to be unsure whether Gordon's are a football injury or acne related.

Gawd, Alan's is huge though! I was sure he'd has a partial lobotomy or something. Incidentally, "Tall, Dark and Hansen" is not actually his latest book, but actually a commemorative text detailing his 10 years at Liverpool. It's out of print now and goes for at least £40 on Amazon. It is a fucking fantastic pun though.