Project: Aisleyne - Winner Of BB

[David]

Fuck it.

[I Hate Lana Lang]

That went well!


She's the top girl of the year still - and she should have won against that boring Tourette's faker.

[Steven]

Third place is not too shabby. It's not as good as first, but the important thing is that we tried, right?

I'm proud of her, anyway.

[I Hate Lana Lang]

I'm really pleased. Honestly. She beat Nikki and Richard, two massively popular housemates.

[David]

I hope that someone with better media contacts than me will arrange a Lowculture exclusive with Aisleyne??

[SweatShop]

Those Great British Public CUNTS.

[Steven]

I did have my suspicions that our plans would not reach fruition when I realised the crowd was not Aisleyne-friendly.

The crowd are cunts, of course.

[Lucinda]

Aww. Well we gave it a good shot, guys. She was really not liked at all a short while ago, and I'm proud that she was the last girl! At least Aisleyne beat Nikki, she of the fake tantrums.

I'm so nervous about the way the crowd is going to react! There were so many people booing and chanting to get her out.

[I Hate Lana Lang]

They are bitter. But we mustn't be too harsh on them, they did reduce Nikki to a weeping wreck.

[Steven]

Question: should I watch the rest of it? I haven't watched the rest of the series, and while I'd like to hear what Aisleyne has to say, I don't want to hear her getting booed. Likewise, I don't really give a toss who wins now.

(I almost feel like I should apologise, y'know. The people I support on reality shows never win. Perhaps if I hadn't joined the campaign, Aisleyne might have escaped the curse.)

[I Hate Lana Lang]

I'm probably going to watch it. Fuck the booing, the public voted for her to come third given how much vitriol was shot at her. She deserves to be cheered!

[Joel]

I have to watch her interview. I love her so.

Jimmy Carr just took the piss out of Aisleyne. Fucker.

[[james]]

Somewhere out there, Greg just ejaculated.

[David]

[pauliepoos]

The Conway Sisters
Bonnie Langford
The Badger
The Lebanon

And now our Aisleyne.

Injustice is all around. Except in Blaenau Ffestiniog.

[Steven]

The injustice regarding the Conway Sisters is that they got picked over Maria, right? RIGHT?

[oohlalaura]

I like to think ha, at least she beat that skank Nikki. But the sad thing is, Nikki probably regards Pete's victory as hers. Shes gonna have him down oxford street gonna than he can say eeezamannah.

[WhiteNoiseMaker]

WELL DONE everyone, a fantastic result although of course not the one we would have really liked. But to see Jenny 'you'll ruin my relationship' go before her, and that explosion in the nightmare factory Nikki go before her - FANTASTIC.

At first I was thinking 'Why, why why are there so many people who want a lying dead-friend 100,000 reasons god exists spineless wimp and a condom-leaving Mikey worshipping racist child to beat this fucking big ballsy legend of a woman'. It was starting to upset me that we are outnumbered so by buffoons - but then I realised that out of the 22 housemates, she came 3rd, which is a fucking high placement, and even if we're in a minority it's a pretty fucking sizeable one, and ultimately the country is stuffed full of people who CAN see the warm humanity, decency and comedy in someone like Aisleyne. So bravo us and bravo the rest of the unknown thousands.

EDIT: OK so Pete apparently got maybe half or more of the vote, so it was pretty much a landslide. Ugh. I suppose I must remember, slipping into some kind of sub-Cantona and indeed vaguely drunken pretension - the spaces between the stars are very black, but the stars shine no less brightly for it.

[Steven]

Not necessarily. Anybody know the final vote tallies, by the way? According to BBC News, Pete got "61% of the final two split", which I assume means that the ratio of Pete votes to Glyn votes, discounting all others was roughly 3:2, rather than Pete getting 61% of the overall vote between all six. But do we know percentages when all six housemates are considered? I'd be intrigued to find out if we were at all close.

[Joel]

Last girl standing! I think that's the best we could have hoped for really, given that this country's still fairly hostile to women in these sorts of contests. The only female public-vote winners I can think of are Kate Lawler (geezer-bird); Michelle McMammoth (fat bird sympathy vote); Alex Parks (lezzer) and Nadia (crazy Portguese former man).
I think any self-assured pretty woman will suffer from the 'who does she think she is?' factor, so bravo Aisleyne for making it as far as you did. And for giving thousands of gays a new 'Am I bovvered?' in 'You better know yourself.'

Also for knocking Nikki into a cocked hat. The only reason she was so traumatised was that she was certain she was going to win. (Probably because Endemol told her so.)

[Steven]

You forgot Lucy Benjamin. But she had the whole "I was rubbish but then I suddenly got good, so yay for my rags to riches story" thing going on.

And yes, Kate Lawler was totally a man in drag.

[Lucinda]

Oh, my! The Aisleyne campaign has really bigged up the board, I've only just noticed that the most members ever online thingy was 103 on Wednesday!

[suzieque]

I think you got loads of us newbees cos of the Aisleyne thing. I didn't even know you existed (sorry!!!!!!!) but now you have me, and I have you, and I ain't going to let go!!!!!

[Floss]

pandarama said:

Anybody know the final vote tallies, by the way?

Jennie 0.9%
Nikki 6.5%
Richard 9.2%
Aisleyne 22%
Glyn 38.8%
Pete 61.2%

I know it doesn't add up to 100 - but it's the percentage of the vote each housemate had at the time of eviction...

I've heard 'rumours' that the vote got fucked up - with no text messages counted after 8pm. That could explain why people didn't get thank you messages when they voted. I don't think it would have changed the final result much, though.

[Cherubic]

Poor Jennie. Of the ten minutes I saw of her I thought she was ace.